Staying Alive

I couldn't help but think of a sexy John Travolta when I typed the title of this post. Who could ever pass up a chance of that hot guy in a leotard?

Anyway, I am exactly "Staying Alive" at school. Medicated boy has already stolen my heart. Even though there is a challenge there.....he is such a smart and lovable boy in need of a lot of TLC.

However, I had two get suspended for trying to "beat the tar" (excuse the hillbilly reference) out of each other. That whas given me most of yesterday and today with a semi-peaceful environment. I am sure they will be back tomorrow, well rested, and ready to work on me. They just don't know, I never lose! I keep asking myself how this class went from better than expected to making me think it is time for some severe medication until May for me.

On another note, I have started graduate school. I love the feeling of sitting in class and learning sooooo much. I am a much better student now that 10 years ago. I am attending two nights a week, and having a problem with giving up some of the mommy control that I have been allowed to have for so many years.

Hope to have time to write more later in the week. Keep me in your prayers......Lord, knows I need it. This just may be the class that I will write a book about and make lots of money.




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Dear Mom

Dear Mom of Medicated Boy,
I am very pleased to be given the challenge opportunity to teach your son. He is such a cute little fella. Tuesday when he showed up I was happy to greet him with open arms.

Yesterday about forced me to retire was a real challenge with medicated boy. As if it wasn't enough dealing with him, you decided to call and whine complain to the principal that some other students were picking on him.

Upon your demand, my principal and I both agreed to drop everything we had so carefully planned for our day and meet with you. Even though this is my only moment of the day to go to the bathroom and drink a Diet Dr. Pepper, I still smiled and introduced myself.

Your list of medications for medicated boy was enough to make me want to crawl under the table, but that was nothing compared to your vivid descriptions of the multiple attempts he has made on burning down your house and throwing a desk at his last teacher. I know I mistakenly took your bragging attitude and carefree laughter of these incidences, surely it was just that you were nervous. I am sure you are serious when it come to getting your child out of the house because you fear for your life your child receiving a quality education.

You definitely have a gift for talking, but it would have been nice if we could have had a more serious conversation about medicated boy's issues rather than your own personal story hour.

I am positive you are as concerned as I am about the many different dangerous prescriptions your child is taking at the present time. I understand this is to prevent his psychotic episodes, but I am not sure about the three blood pressure pills and their benefits.

I will not share with you the pure joy of my classroom before Tuesday, however I would like to tell you how your precious child scared even the toughest little devil in my room today. I can't even explain the shock I felt as your rather small lad engaged in a physical struggle over a MARKER with the SPED assistant who is trained in dealing with children like yours. I can see you and medicated boy have a special bond by the way he kept screaming, "No, don't take my marker, my mom gave it to me."

I don't like to brag, but I am pleased with how powerful my voice was to keep teaching and try to over-ride your son's loud fit. I think I even managed to keep a few children's attention through it all.

I am so excited to think that maybe through my hell challenges this year that I have a great chance at getting teacher of the year.

Tired of being on my toes,
Absurdly Your Son's Teacher





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I spoke too soon

Oh. my. gosh! I spoke too soon about my wonderful darlings at school. I found out yesterday I was getting a new student. He wasn't suppose to come until today, BUT his mom called after lunch and wanted to bring her sweetheart on to school for a couple of hours to meet everyone. Red flag! Red flag! He came in and was pretty okay. The SPED teacher told me that he had an average IQ, but she also warned me he had a SPED ruling for emotional and behavior issues. Red flag! Red flag!

Well today was totally hell a challenge, to say the least. After looking in the records I found out he was only allowed in the regular classroom for an hour a day!!!!! Red flag! Red flag! I left school this afternoon feeling like I had been run over by a truck, but not before emailing the TWO sped teachers (who I found sitting at their computer all day today with NO students) and telling them that their assistance is greatly needed tomorrow if I don't want to be committed to the insane asylum.




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ADHD, and we all live happily ever after

So, as I said in the last post in the last five years things have gotten so much better. 4WB is on Adderal XL. He does not take it on the weekends or in the summer, for that fact during any school holiday.

We ended up moving to a new town. Not because I have an ADHD child that was labeled in school, but because our house burned and my husband had been working out of town for 2 years. This was a brand new start for 4WB. He is, if I do say so myself, a very popular jr. high kid. Friends are constantly at my house, which is kinda how I like it.

He loves school and has bonded with all seven of his teachers. He is competitively swimming, and he just found out he made the HIGH SCHOOL swim team. They chose three 7th graders to give the honors of joining the team. Hey, who knows, maybe I have the next Michael Phelps on my hands.

All I know, is that ADHD is a REAL disorder. The wonderful head doctor told me that it is like a normal person sitting down in front of the television. You have the remote, and you turn it every 15 to 20 seconds, then you expect them to tell you everything from each channel. I had never thought about it like that.

I do, however, truly believe that ADHD is OVER DIAGNOSED!!!! Don't get me wrong. But I am very proud that every school I have taught in (all three) I always get the ADHD, ADD, and behavior problem kids. I would like to think it is because through the eyes of my son, I have become a much better person.

My wonderful 4WB and I have a wonderful relationship today. I would like to think it is because I wasn't afraid to ask for help. I put my pride aside and wanted to do what was best for us both....even if that meant me getting a little therapy.




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ADHD part two

So my uncle, the wonderful doctor, calmed me down. I told him that 4WB wouldn't listen, he moved from room to room while sleeping, he wouldn't sit still EVER, and we couldn't get his simple preschool homework done. (Yes, his wonderful PRESCHOOL teacher gave homework.)

He did what any good doctor would do and sent us BOTH to a psychiatrist. We went to our appointment the following week. I was a bit nervous......I had never been to a shrink one of these head doctors. I can still remember the smell of the soft leather chairs 4WB and I were sitting in side by side.

It seems as soon as I got settled in my chair the head doctor asked me to step outside for a moment. I did, praying that 4WB didn't destroy his office in the 5.6 seconds we were on the other side of the door. Head doctor told me that when we went back in his office he was going to talk to me, but he did not want me to correct 4WB or say anything about what he was doing while we talked. Uh.....emkay.

We went back in and he started asking me about 4WB's sleeping habits, eating habits, social skills, and so on. Now 4WB is sitting to my right and I can see him bouncing in this nice leather chair. It was one of those with a springy center, and here is this 5 year old bouncing like he is in one of those moon walk things they have at birthday parties.

I did as the head doctor said, and didn't say a word which was very hard for me. I mean I was used to having to correct him with at least every three breaths. I could barely concentrate on the questions I was being asked when suddenly he turned upside down in the chair. Now picture this.....a nervous emotionally drained mom sitting, trying to have a serious conversation while shifting her eyes to the right at a little 5 year old, cute, eyeglasses wearing boy who is sitting upside down in a bouncy leather chair swinging his feet back and forth as if he were dancing on the ceiling.

As if that wasn't bad enough, he changes positions again..... I am cringing wondering what is he going to do next? 4WB is now sitting, looking at me. I try not to look at him and keep my eyes focused on the head doctor. Then suddenly, 4WB leans close to my ear as if her were about to whisper something. Then at the top of his lungs he starts singing "Who let the dogs out, who? who?" I could have died.

Although it was very serious to me then, I die out laughing every time I think of that now. He use to love that song and would sing it often. The problem was he never knew when it was appropriate and inappropriate.

We continued our bi-weekly visits for about two months. During this time, I still had 4WB on his restrictive diet of no caffeine, nothing with artificial red dye, and a small amount of sugar. Doesn't sound so bad until you start looking at food labels and realize EVERYTHING has artificial red dye or coloring in it.

Finally, on our 8th visit, the head doctor ask 4WB to go play with the ladies at the front desk. He just wants to talk to me. I thought to myself.....here it comes....he is going to tell me I am a terrible parent and 4WB's problems are because of me. But I was mistaken on that thought. He told me that 4WB demonstrated one of the worse ADHD cases he had ever seen.

Let me tell you, the head doctor had been practicing a long time at this point. I think we should have been given a prize. I am really quite surprise that he didn't want to video tape us for future therapist. Not only was he diagnosed severely ADHD, but he was also given the diagnosis of having an obsessive disorder about wanting everything he did to be perfect. (I should probley take credit for the obsessive issues. I am glad he didn't tell me my diagnosis.)

We continued therapy and tried many different suggestions from the good head doctor. Strict scheduling, talking eye to eye anytime we talked to 4WB, discussing accommodations with his teacher, etc. Life was still a struggle for us all.

Finally, I agreed after his first grade year to try the medicine after a very serious session with the head doctor. He again sent 4WB out of the room and told me that if my son knew what suicide was, he would be there. It still gives me chills to this day to remember him saying this to me. I couldn't understand. Mechanic Man and I were very loving parents. We provided a wonderful, stable home. 4WB had loving grandparents, aunts, and uncles. How could this head doctor tell me this?

It was a combination of the ADHD and the obsessive disorder. 4WB had realized at the young, tender age of 7, that his work would never be perfect so why even try. He had began giving up, not even attempting things at school anymore. You see, society has a very bad habit of labeling children BAD when really they aren't. He was just an active, unique little boy who just couldn't seem to fit in.

He was prescribed Concerta. It was a wonderful medicine except that it was torture trying to get a now 7 year old to swallow it. After a few short weeks, I noticed we were reverting back to previous behavior and patterns. I couldn't figure it out until I moved the couch to vacuum one weekend and found all these little Concerta pills under it.

How smart is that for a 7 year old? He would act as if he swallowed it with me in the kitchen only to walk in the living room and hide it under the couch. I called the doctor the following Monday, and he changed his prescription to a pill that was not long acting and could be broken in half or crushed. This time it was Adderall.

4WB was a different child. He had real friends. He wasn't an outcast in public situations anymore. He even got a smiley face from the teacher! And best of all, my son and I had the loving, fun relationship I had always longed for.

Things had even gotten better in the last 5 years! I will try to finish this one up tomorrow.




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ADHD

I am stealing a thought from AFRO today. It ignited some major brain waves when I read it. I normally try not to write about serious issues especially when they hit close to home. I may decide never to go against that after this post, but I have decided to put myself out there.

My son, 4-wheeler boy(4WB), is now 12. I can't explain how I feel about ADHD without going back to his baby days. 4WB was a wonderful, full term, healthy baby. I followed all the baby book recommendations while I was pregnant. I listened to classical music at least two hours a day. (I was commuting to finish my BSE at this time so I listened in the car.) I read to my belly often. I ate lots of fruits and vegetables, and I even exercised.

4WB arrived weighing 8 pounds and 12 1/2 ounces. He slept and ate well. He hit all his milestones at the suggested time.

Now bare in mind that I am teaching by the time he reaches the age of 2. I had many friends who also had children around the same age. I started noticing differences when we all got together for "play" days.

I shrugged this off, thinking my boy is just different. When he was 4 and was about to start pre-school I noticed that he could never watch short episodes on television. I wouldn't have thought anything of this, but all my friend's children were watching television for small amounts of time. Again, I shrugged it off.

When he entered pre-school it was as if the teacher immediately thought he should be medicated. I will never forget her calling me and mechanic man in to talk. We were so nervous and thought it must be really bad. I wanted to laugh in her face when she so seriously told me he wasn't paying attention during carpet time. I asked if he was bothering other children. No. Is he struggling academically with what you are teaching during carpet time? No. Then, what is he doing? She sat for a moment then leaned over and in a whisper voice said "He is playing with his shoestrings!"

I know I sat there with my jaw hanging. I should have stood up and loudly said I was taking him to boarding school that we just couldn't have a child that played with his shoestrings! I mean really......HE WAS 4 YEARS OLD!

Let me tell you, that teacher lost all ground with me that very day. We made it through 4 year old by simply smiling and saying thank you when she told us these types of things.

The next year, 4WB entered K5. Things became a little more serious. He wasn't sleeping well at night. He would spout back when I told him to do something. He couldn't sit still even for a few minutes, and when he was sitting he was sitting on his feet, rocking. He was tapping, bouncing, kicking, or something ALL THE TIME! Now, I know some of you are saying....here it is another poorly behaved child put on medicine because his parents are too lazy to discipline him.

I assure you that is not the case. I spanked 4WB at least twice a day, sometimes three or four times. I tried sending him to his room and the time out chair. Nothing seemed to work. I usually ended my day in tears, feeling like a horrible mother.

Let me interupt the story right here to say. I have been complimented on my behavior management with my students. I have been invited to do workshops for other teachers on classroom management, so PLEASE do not think I was lacking as a parent.

One day I finally lost it. I mean really lost it! I drove to the my child's doctor's office, which happen to be my uncle. When he came in the room where we were I completely broke down. You know the kind of crying where you can't breath, your face is all scrunched up, snot is running out of your nose, and your trying to tell something which no one can understand? I said "I don't know if it is me needing parenting classes or him needed some therapy but WE need help!"

He worked for about 30 minutes to calm me down and then we had a rational conversation.

(Tune in tomorrow for what he told me that day.)






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Don't judge a book by what you hear others say

OK....so the first week of school is a wee bit busy for me. I haven't had the time to write and barely to visit.

I have been quite anxious to meet the new darlings in my class. Last year they almost forced a new teacher to quit and a seasoned teacher to enter the crazy house. I always like to start with a clean slate, but I have to admit the drama from last year was always yelling in the back of my head to run!

I strategically thought out my plan.....I would enter the classroom as a drill sergeant that gave hugs. I would run a tight ship and anyone who couldn't abide by the law would be thrown overboard.

Much to my dismay......this class has been wonderful! I have had them for three full days now, and I keep waiting for the bombs to start going off. I think maybe somehow their pins kept being pulled from their grenades last year to cause the issues that sent everyone talking.

This group has proven to be an intelligent, hard working mixture of boys and girls who need a little extra love. I am more than willing to give them the extra love and words of encouragement they have so screamed a need for.

On another note, 4 wheeler boy has entered junior high like a pro. He loves it so far, and he even told me about the many different groups that hang out at break. I couldn't help but shoot coke out of my nose as he vividly described the green "stuff" (eyeshadow) a girl has smeared all over the top of her eyes.

It has made my heart a little sadder in a way that he doesn't seem to need me to comfort him as much anymore. All the while, I can't help but smile thinking mechanic man and I must have done something right in the raising department for him to have adjusted so well.

Prissy girl is the nerdy intelligent little scholar she has always appeared to be since she entered the first day of pre-K. She loves school! I only wish I was as self motivated in completing my homework as she is.

Until next time....I am still absurdly yours.
P.S. Can someone tell me how to post a youtube video on here?






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